The Awkward Handshake...and other "Traditions"

I'm not sure what's behind the "tradition" of the pastor standing at the head of the casket after a funeral service.  As the "viewing line" comes around, they all look at me with this bewildered look, like "am I supposed to shake your hand?"  I know that the few times I've been to services that I'm not conducting, I do appreciate the chance to thank the minister for his words of encouragement, etc. so maybe that's all it is. But most folks still give that confused look.

However, if the first person shakes my hand, then the rest of the line sees that and has this, "Oh, I guess I have to shake your hand now, too" look.  If it's a church member's service and it's other church members, the handshake is real.  For folks I don't know, it can be very awkward. 

I share that simply because I've made the decision that since 90% of all funerals I attend end with me up front offering this awkward handshake, I think that when I die I should leave instructions for the funeral director to embalm my body with my hand hanging out of the casket so that my last funeral can end like all the others: with me up front offering folks an awkward handshake.  (For the record, this probably won't actually happen since upon sharing the idea with my wife she informed me there was "no way" she was touching me when I'm dead!  Oh, feel the love.)

This brought to mind a recurring idea for me: why do we do the things we do?  Why do the bride and groom stuff cake into each other's mouths at weddings, for example? Or why do you have to have different forks for salads and desserts?  These are the things that keep me up at night.

I know that there are probably good reasons for most "traditions" in the church and elsewhere.  If I had the time and patience I could probably track those reasons down.  I don't mean to make light of those things that really do have meaning.  But so much of what we do, we simply do because...that's what we do.

Simple things like church bulletins.  Insignificant for most folks, but let the copier break down and go a Sunday without any, and while most might not really care, you'll have a couple of folks at least who will have a meltdown.  "What?! No bulletins?  We won't know what song is coming next! How will we survive?!"  Maybe not that bad, but we get used to things like that, and begin to think they are a vital part of things when they really aren't.

Or the other hand shaking thing, the one where we take time in the worship service to walk around and shake hands.  We do this before we even begin the actual service, but I've been places where the service starts, and then we stop to shake hands, and then we try to go back to worship.  Seems an odd insertion.  And again, some folks will freak if we don't do it. 

This one I really did experience.  We didn't do the "greeting time" one Sunday years ago, and I had someone come up after the service and was very irate about it.  "Why didn't we have the greeting time?  Why are you trying to change things?  Etc."

Those are simple things.  But the point is, we ought to take time now and then to consider the things we do in the church, or in our families, or wherever.  And we need to ask ourselves, are these meaningful things, useful things, productive things, Biblical things?  Or are they just traditions, habits, rituals, things we don't even know why we're doing them. 

Just some thoughts.  And if you do for some reason happen to attend my funeral, don't be shy, go ahead and shake that hand.  It will mean a lot to me.